A lot of you ladies are writing in these days which hopefully means you are finding my advice of value. Unfortunately I haven’t been able to answer everyone’s questions right away so instead I’m going to start a “queue” of dating advice. If anyone wants to chime in before I get around to posting my advice, please do.

I’ve been dating this guy for almost 3 months and at the time he was in the process of getting his ex girlfriend out of his apartment since they had lived together for almost a year, she’s finally gone and now I’m wondering did he need a little space between the relationship he once had with her before he jumped in and started dating me? We used to be together everyday go out together almost everyday and now he’s telling me he just need a little space and how its nothing personal, just a lil reality check that’s all. He still comes to my house and vice versa just not everyday maybe 1 or 2 a week. So my question is does he really need some time or does he want me to go and move on? He’s 36 and I’m 27 his ex is 27 also. Please help.


Ok, so I have NO clue what to do. I’ve been dating him for about 6 months, and everything started off perfect. But the only problem is, he doesn’t know how to show me affection, and he doesn’t understand that girls NEED to be shown thay they’re loved. He doesn’t know how to do it.. And I don’t know how to get him to open up.Yes we’re sexually active and that seems to be the only time when he FULLY knows how to treat me. He’s pushing me away very slowly, and I’m beginning to fall out of love with him. But in the same sense, when he doesn’t show me affection, it makes me want him even more! I’m so lost. Please help me…


Okay, I will try to keep this brief.
My live-in boyfriend of 3 years comes home the other nite, and suggested that we take some photos with his brother’s digital camera. “Why?”, I ask. He says so that we can upload them to the computer. Now understand, we have NEVER talked about putting our photos on the computer, or ANYTHING remotely like that. So, since it was 10:30 at nite, and I didn’t quite look my best, I told him to wait until I got dressed for work tomorrow (ya’ know, so I could look my best!)

Well, he doesn’t wait, snaps a couple of impromptu shots of me; the ones with eyes closed or with my mouth open, and I ask him to please wait until tomorrow. Okay, he then leaves me alone and goes about his business while I get ready for bed.

Okay, so flash forward to the next day. I get home from work and I’m thinking about my ugly photos on the camera and decide to erase them. Well, as I begin to scroll through the photos I do see the 2 of me, but then I see about 10 of him that he has taken of himself. Now he is rather built, so at least 9 of the pictures were taken of him without a shirt; posing. However, the last picture was a total frontal nude shot for all the world to see; again posing.

Now, I could just think that he wants to look at himself naked, but he can do that everyday in the mirror, right? And then there’s the whole, “so we can put them on the computer” comment. Yeah, and I can barely get him to send me an email, or for him to read the ones that I send to him!

So I’m kinda stuck. If he’s just a kinky freak-that would be nice to know. But like I wrote, we have been together 3 years and I do find this odd behavior.

Any advice or words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.

So again I sigh. I’m not sure what to ask him. Let me rephrase that; I’m not really sure HOW to ask him. I have a feeling that whatever the answer is will be a lie. He’s lied to me about little things, so I’m thinking something weird like this is gonna require a BIG lie.

I’m from Southern California and I found your site by typing the words, “Dear + I have read my boyfriend’s text messages” (But that’s a WHOLE other story!!) And I did find a VERY blatant text from someone telling him that she was “sorry that they haven’t been intimate lately, but she will make it up to him” (Yeah-that was from December). But like I said…that’s an entirely separate issue……or is it?

I still believe the worst part is NOT knowing!

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